When you’re in love, it’s normal to want to do everything in your power to make your significant other happy. One-sided love at the beginning has hope, excitement and a longing to see the other person respond to your feelings.
As time passes by, this hope turns into anxiety and finally a heartbreak as the hope turns into hopelessness. But what to do when love is one sided? How long would you wait for a person to reciprocate? Well!! That’s a million -dollar question.
In the books and the movies people wait a lifetime and then finally their love is reciprocated. But reality is different. You can keep feeling single in a relationship forever and your love might never be reciprocated.
Then you would be only left with a broken heart and lessons learnt from unrequited love. In that case the most sensible thing would be to know the one-sided relationship signs and deal with it accordingly.
What Is One-Sided Relationship?
When you fall for someone you initially don’t know if they have the same feelings for you. But when you start dropping hints and they start reciprocating, it gradually becomes a two-way street from where you move to the next level – that could be dating, exclusivity or even long-term plans.
But in a one-sided relationship psychology you keep hoping for the person to give you the attention you want, latch on to the hints you throw or understand that you are madly in love with them. But most often the hopes are dashed because the other person might be understanding your feelings but they do not reciprocate because they have none for you.
If you are looking for one-sided relationship meaning then it simply means that all the feelings of love, euphoria and excitement are relegated to one person, there is nothing mutual here.
People are usually tormented by unrequited love when they fall for a classmate or close friend, a friend’s sibling, a colleague or even a family friend. They have a basic relationship with them, even a friendship, that they hope would transform into love one day. But usually they are pushed into the friendzone or entirely ignored.
Before you actually hit the rock bottom in this doomed relationship that is consuming you, it is a good idea to introspect and look for signs that suggest that this is clearly one-sided love and more than anything else you should be thinking of how to get over this unrequited love.
Signs Of A One-Sided Relationship
A tell-tale sign of a one-sided love story is if your partner never hesitates to ask favors of you that requires you to sacrifice your time and energy, yet when it’s time to reciprocate the favor, he or she never seems to have the time.
Your partner will say he or she has too much on his or her plate or that he or she too busy with work or a previous engagement.
Your partner might say that he or she has too many other obligations to address, and may get angry and tell you that you’re expecting and wanting too much from him or her if you express any signs of disappointment.
In your partner’s mind, you doing favors for him or her is a given, not vice versa.
He or She Always Chooses His or Her Friends Over You
When your boyfriend or girlfriend feels like going out, he or she doesn’t invite you to come along. And when he or she feels like spending a night in, you don’t get an invite to that, either.
If you try to address the problem, your partner will accuse you of “nagging” and of instigating the same fight over and over again.
So instead, you may ask him or her to spend time with you and your friends, but he or she rejects the offer. Your partner simply prefers calling up his or her friends and spending time with them, leaving you at home alone wondering what you did wrong.
You Feel a Need to Apologize for Things You Shouldn’t Apologize for
If you’re in a one-sided relationship, your partner is probably a master of guilt-tripping and making you feel bad for things you have no reason to worry over, like getting emotional, or needing to talk about something that’s been on your mind.
Yes, a relationship is meant to bring happiness into each other’s lives, but that doesn’t mean your partner isn’t responsible for comforting you when you feel down. Part of being in a relationship is being there for the other person when life isn’t carefree. You should never apologize when looking for your significant other’s support.
Only You are Talking About the Future
While you are making plans for the future with them, you’ll see them laugh, ignore or even worse mock about your future plans together. In any conversation you have with him/her, it is only you who talks about doing things together in the future.
Discussions on having to make financial plans to planning your next birthday together, all appear to them just like any other passing piece of information. They rarely talk to you about their life.
Worst still they might be making plans about their future with someone else, right in front of you, and you are so neck deep in your one-sided love that you are keeping on hoping their relationship won’t work and they would turn to you. This is a one-sided relationship sign that says that nothing’s really going to come out of this hope and it is practical to move on.
You Feel a Need to Justify His or Her Behavior to Your Family or Friends
Like why he or she didn’t show up to family dinner, or why didn’t do anything special for your birthday or why him or her getting angry over trivial matters is okay. You constantly make excuses for why he or she treat you the way he or she does.
You have to reassure your loved ones (and yourself) that this relationship is right for you; that despite the negative sides to this romance, the positives outweigh all of the tears and arguments.
You reassure them that even though they don’t see it and despite all the bullsh*t your partner puts you through, deep down, he or she truly loves you.
You Constantly Feel Stressed Out
You are constantly worrying that the relationship is on the brink of falling apart, and that it’s all your fault.
Or that you’re trying to hard to show your partner how much you love them and annoy them in the process. Or that when the two of you are together, your boyfriend or girlfriend would rather be anywhere but with you.
Yes, you should take the time to reflect on your relationship and evaluate what aspects should be worked on, but that doesn’t mean you should overanalyze everything to the point of nearing an anxiety attack. If your partner is making you feel that stressed out and insecure, then you shouldn’t be with him or her.
He or She Ignores Relationship Problems
You’re constantly the one trying to talk about the relationship needs that aren’t being met, and your significant other makes you feel bad for doing it.
You mention you feel as though you’re the only one putting in effort to make this relationship work, and he or she rolls their eyes, sighs heavily and get angry with you yet again.
He or she doesn’t want to address any problems, because he or she doesn’t care enough. So you feel like you’re left with two options: trying to fix the issues yourself, or ignoring the problems altogether.
Your Partner Doesn’t Care About You. Plain and Simple
The bottom line is, if you’re in a one-sided relationship, your partner simply doesn’t care about your well-being or making you happy. A caring boyfriend or girlfriend has genuine interest in your day-to-day life. He or she will check in regularly to see what you’re up to and frequently ask to spend time with you.
But your partner doesn’t do that. No matter how much you hope your partner will, he or she won’t. His or her “I-don’t-care-about-you” attitude is never going to change. And the sooner you accept it, the sooner you can leave him or her behind.
Realizing that you’re in a one-sided relationship is tough, admitting it to yourself is even harder and putting an end to the destructive romance is the most crushing part of it all.
But when you finally do choose to end the relationship, be sure to surround yourself with the support of your family and friends. Even though your significant other was never there for you, you’re going to need people to turn to now.
Make a list of all the reasons you ended the relationship. That way, if your partner tries to come crawling back, you’ll have something to refer to that will remind you of why you got out of the relationship in the first place.